Saturday, September 30, 2006

"If you're violating your standards faster than you can lower them, time to go away," Robin Williams said.

Robin Williams says this about going to Rehab. Man, I love people who are honest about themselves..don't you? Its so much easier to say, "I blew it." than to look like a jerk trying to justify...I so much more respect people who just say...."I blew it!"

You had a chance...why weren't those you loved worth dropping all your pride?..

.....Neil Young...."Walk On"
But sooner or later
it all gets real.

Walk on, walk on,
Walk on, walk on.

Scene from my all time favorite movie..Life As A House..

George: I have hated this house from the moment my father put it in my name. Imagine, 29 years of hating what you're living in, hating what you *are*. This is the end of it, Sam. I'm finally building something of my own. Something I can be proud to give you.
Sam: Don't. I don't want it.
George: Fine. You can do what you want with it. All I want you to remember is that we built a house together.
Sam: You didn't build s**t. You're just tearing your father down.
George: That's right. It feels good.

just a little frustrated today with those who give up on something beautiful and the payoff for them is trying to look okay....hope its worth it..

I don't know what you want to do with this comes off a bit random...sorry...peace..kiss those you love today...

Thursday, September 28, 2006


Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Live life for the children...Live your life for the children*

My precious Katie who yells to me, "I am making good choices Ms. Mann!"...hahaha

My precious Jaden who always tells me he is going to miss me as he exits the room for the day.

*From "Save The Children" by U2

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Guys..I was just, why would I ruin my running or training at the health club for a little rolled up piece of addiction?...I love you for caring!

..and everything thats new, has bravely surfaced
teaching us to breathe
what was frozen through, is newly purposed
turning all things green, so it is with you
and how you make me new, with every seasons change
and so it will be, as you are all creating me
summer, autumn, winter, spring...Nicole Nordeman...."Every Season"

Since May, each month has brought about new change in my life. Each month has brought about a new season in my heart. These next few months will be some tough ones but with His help and yours I believe I can do this...

Some Thank yous:

Thanks to God who has been an ever present wonder to me and strength and love..

Thanks to my son and my daughter who make me laugh and make me cry and make me wonder how I could ever be so blessed as I am with them in my life...

Thanks to my friend Beth who takes me out and randomly drops food by and calls me and listens..and listens and listens..:)

Thanks to Candy and my small group who made graduation happen for me when I could not move...

Thanks to Clint who spoke honestly to me when I know it was hard for him and who spoke words of wisdom and love and will forever be my brother...

Thanks to Cole who gives me a hug on Sundays just when I need it..I (I have begun to see those at church who don't quite know what to do with me so they walk away....heads up...if you see a single mom at church give her a hug..)

Thanks to Happy who was willing to cash in all his chips to tell me what I should not do in my last post..thanks..I can always count on you buddy...

Thanks to Scott whos blog has been uplifting and whos comments are an encouragement..

Thanks to Jeremy who calls me at random times and makes sure I am alright, thanks Montreal...

Thanks to my blogging posse who are so precious to me...

Thanks to those of you who tell me positive things about Sam...

Thanks to those of you who have had Sam in your home even when you were busy..Sam notices and so do I..he needs this more than you can imagine...

Thanks to Cademon's Call and Mercy Me and Audio Adrenaline who sang to Sam at their concerts..

Thanks to the Varners for having Sam in your home...

Thanks to Cheryl for hiring me and giving me a chance to work in an amazing atmosphere of love and support...

Thanks to all the boys who yell at xbox and playstation 2 in my home..(Max, The Lang brothers, Matt)

Thanks to the college boys who have been there for Sam and have started a Bible study..

Thanks to Kyle who has been a really good friend...

Thanks to Jim, Kyle, Scott and Happy who included me on the cycling post even though I don't own a bike..

Thanks to TMS (Tracy) who I was so happy to see at the blogging party and has been my cheerleader for a long time...that's your gift girl...

Yep, I love you all and your works do not go unnoticed. I have found myself in a situation that I never dreamed I would be in and its interesting to observe how people deal with people who are in this situation. It has caused me to be more aware of those who are suffering and now knowing that just a hug or maybe an invitation to lunch or just a phone call means everything. I am glad God is teaching me these things.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

This is my last cigarette.. my last cigarette*

"Doreen Larkin: What does mama say about the smoking?

Stuart Larkin: Smoking is for Europeans and white trash. "

- Doreen & Stuart.....Mad Tv

So..I am thinking about taking up smoking...what do you guys think?

*From "My Last Cigarette" by KD Lang

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

I've been lately thinking about my life's time All the things I've done and how it's been*

Just thinking about my life and all the experiences and precious people who have moved in and out of it. Its funny, alot of people would think in my circumstances right now that I would be depressed. Well here's the thing, God has performed a miracle in my heart so that every day is a blessing. I'm not sure how that works but I am thankful. I have amazing children and an amazing job. I am back helping in the High School class at church and it just seems like everytime I turn around someone is loving me.
Today I am grateful for all of you who have been a part of this experience....thank you!

*From "Poems Prayers and Promises" by yes, John Denver

Saturday, September 16, 2006

My hands are small, I know, but they're not yours they are my own*

Robert is four years old. Robert has been hitting alot lately. Thursday was a day that Robert seemed to hit even more. We had talked to him and done the time out/chill out thing but it just seemed as though nothing was getting through. I am walking my precious little class out to the playground and look back only to see Robert turn around and slug Noah in the stomach. It just takes my breath away. I take him aside and tell him he has lost the privledge to ride trikes at the playground.(His favorite thing to do!) I make him sit out and I just feel really frustrated. I love this kid but man, I hate hitting. The way Robert hits is not just pushing his friend. Robert's hitting is very intentional. Later I go and tell Robert he can get up. He comes up to me and I sit on the grass. I ask Robert how he is. He looks at me. I ask him how things are at home. He says, "Daddy doesn't come home anymore." "Robert" I ask, "Does that make you sad?" He shakes his head. I sit down on the grass and hold out my arms and he falls into them. As the hustle and bustle of the playground happens around us, I hold Robert and he tells me how he is feeling. Yes, I understand now. Robert feels his Dad doesn't want to be with him and this makes him angry...angry enough to just haul off and hit someone.
Next day Robert is brought to me during my planning period because he has hit a friend in Motor Lab. I asked Robert to give me his hands. I hold his hands and tell him that his hands are not for hitting but are made to hold Mrs. Mann's hands. He stands there holding my hand for awhile then makes his way back to the time out chair.
Yesterday was a much better day for Robert.
Pray for Robert....Pray for me as I try to teach Robert not that a circle isn't a square but that no matter what pain is inflicted upon him in life he is to respond in love and this is what will fill his heart with peace. I pray that in some way Robert feels God's love in my classroom. When you feel God's love you can only respond in matter what..

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
Martin Luther King Jr
Being hit by someone's hands...hurts...

*From "Hands" by Jewel

Monday, September 11, 2006

2,658 american soldiers have died in Iraq as of September 6, 2006.

It is 9/11 and not only am I thinking of those who lost loved ones in the WTC but also thinking about those who have lost their boys and girls to this war.

Such a tragedy.....

Friday, September 08, 2006

It's something unpredictable But in the end is right. I hope you had the time of your life...*

Frickin rhymes with chicken....

*From "Time of Your Life" by Green Day

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Blessings from Heaven

I take bubbles to the playground and just come from all over the playground laughing trying to catch the bubbles and its magical!

okay...I woke Ariana from her nap and she looked at me, sleep eyed, and said, "I woke up loving you."
This little class is fast becoming my family. Alex is awesome and told me I could go to "his fair." The Fair is coming to Abilene this weekend. Katie is mad that Alex calls it "his fair." All who have been praying for Alex will be happy to know that he is doing great. He has stolen my heart and well, he's the only one who gets to sit on my lap when I am teaching.

Jaden tells me he's going to miss me and I smile...I will be gone to a conference for two days.

Please continue to pray for Katie and Robert. Katie is having a rough time and Robert has good and bad days.

I feel so blessed everyday!!

Monday, September 04, 2006

You didn't have to love me like you did but you did yes you did and I thank you*

A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I look back on this year I think of my friends! I think of how they have cleared a path before me, walked beside me, made me laugh, wiped my tears and stood firm when the wind blew too hard.
Thank you...Thank you...Thank you!
A frien

*From "Thank You" by Bonnie Raitt
d may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature -- Ralph Waldo Emerson