Saturday, April 29, 2006

You know I think it's time to give this game a ride*

I was thinking about people in my life who watched my back when I was too clueless to head in the right direction. The Montgomery Rebels AA baseball team came to mind. I was living in an aparment complex in Montgomery, Alabama. I was in High School. The Montgomery Rebels lived in our complex and we soon became friends. They taught me how to play pool..they let me play water volleyball with them...I never knew they cared for me until one of them brought up this girl in the complex. Her name was Swan. Okay, big red flag there. She was wild and crazy and that got my attention. I remember snorting Koolaid with her once. She heard it would make you high. All it did was make you blow purple stuff out of your nose for days..We were two girls who were surviving on our own. I don't know where her Mom was. My parents were divorced and my sweet mom was working all the time to make ends meet. Anyway those guys didn't like me hanging out with Swan. I took note and quit. Thank you Montgomery Rebels..Oh then there was the guy who cleaned the pool. He had long blonde hair and an earring. I loved hanging out with him. He always played this song on the guitar( yeah, did I mention he played guitar) for me. The song was Suzanne (all I remember was Suzanne takes me down to a place by the river)..Well, he wanted me to run away to Colorado with him..I broke up with my boyfriend and the guy disappeared. Thank you, Lord. Phew...
I loved going to Patterson Field to watch my buddies play..I wish I could tell them thank you...

*From Center Field by John Fogerty

Friday, April 28, 2006

Well - The good Lord is such a good Lord*

I passed!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just found out that I passed the first part of my certification exam..I take the second part in June..
On an earlier post I talked about how nervous I was about taking it...remember?

How can this night get any better...I passed that test...Its thundering outside...Sam and friend are doing the Boxing playstation thing in there and I wish all of you were here so we could go out and celebrate!!

*From "When She Believes" by Ben Harper

my day... I had to do a 360 on a jumprope in my PE class today to get a grade. Now, let's go over this again Prof., Beverly has not jumped rope in a very long time...I don't think Beverly can do this. "You are going to do it today, I am going to get you to do it." she said enthusiastically..Ugh, I hate it when teachers say that..I mean what if I don't..somehow that makes me look like a bigger idiot after she has said that..So we first started as teams working with the long rope. Hello..that is scarey to go running into a moving rope and then you want me to jump and then run out without the rope hitting me. Okay, I got that after a few trial runs. Now, its time to work on the 360. Hello..ya'll I am going to buy me a jumprope because my heart was jumping out of my chest. It is good exercise! Well, I finally got it..okay so the entire class had left except for my teacher and my precious little partner.

I am very excited because there are suppose to be some really rough storms tonight. I hope that it will be timed in such a way to come when I crawl into my bed and snuggle in my covers and be lulled to sleep by the thunder..

Its been a really crazy week and I have thought alot about things. Things just happen at the oddest times and you feel overwhelmed but then you are reminded that God is in control and He loves you. He loves us all and I pray that you take comfort in that this evening.. I love you..

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Plankton's Movie Test...Check it out...

Ha Ha...Plankton, my favorite, is The Godfather and I am Schindler's list.....

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by

Purple Haze all around, Don't know if I'm coming up or down*

I am back...okay, no wise cracks about how I couldn't keep quiet for even a day..

I had a major crush on Jimi Hendrix when I was a kid..Yesterday, I cranked up Jimi Hendrix and it soothed my weary soul..I found myself playing Purple Haze over and over..(don't worry, no chemicals were involved in this time of meditation with Jimi) I emailed Clint about various details in my life (thanks Clint) and told him I had been listening to Jimi Hendrix and felt better. I can't remember if I told him that Purple Haze was my pick for the day. Wow..that would be weird if I didn't because, he put that I was listening to hendrix, then attached a link to his website on his blog where Purple Haze was playing.
He also wrote about what he had found out about Jimi's motivation in writing this song and that made it even more special.

"Hendrix claimed this was inspired by a dream where he was walking under the sea. In the dream, he said a purple haze surrounded him, engulfed him and got him lost. It was a traumatic experience, but in his dream his faith in Jesus saved him."

Well, I loved this. Clint and I were talking about maybe Jimi was a believer and his last breaths were about his savior. Then we dreamed about how cool it would be to be in Heaven with Jimi Hendrix..!!!

*From Purple Haze by Jimi Hendrix

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Tonight we pray for water, Cool water..*

So..I think I am going to take some time to think..

*From "Cool Water" by Joni Mitchell

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Don't know what a slide rule is for*

I am in my office working on math. I hate math. In fact, in our math class yesterday, our teacher mentioned something about an electrical smell and the possibility of us dying in that classroom. I whispered to my friend beside me.,"Yeah, we would be leaving hell and going to heaven." Now we are on all this geometry. Ugh..Good news is its my last math class ever. The bad news is I have a test on Monday and then a final.

"Do not worry about your problems with mathematics, I assure you mine are far greater."
~Albert Einstein~
Yeah..thank you Einstein, you are not totally convincing. Is Einstein dead? That would have been interesting to meet him.

Well, to make it even weirder my distant relative..(Hilbert)..made up one of those ignorant formulas that all those math majors get excited about. Where is that gene..? I mean maybe if I hadn't had that Algebra teacher, who looked like a werewolf, tell my entire class that we were stupid. I know if I ever teach math I am going to make it fun and make everyone think they are little geniuses...

So..I'll get back to it..just needed to vent...

*From "Wonderful World" by Sam Cooke

We went downstairs, past the barber and gymnasium and got our arms tattooed*

My friend had this picture on her facebook. (online MySpace for college students). I liked it. She is moving to Austin and I will miss her..

So....I am thinking about tattoos......
I have thought about getting one lately....
Should I or Should I not...
I have seen some really cool tattoos and I have seen some that left me asking, "What were you thinking?"

Okay, first let's talk about those who are the "tattoo artists." I mean, some of these people look like maybe there first experience with needles had nothing to do with ink on the skin..That will probably be the first obstacle for me...Then there's the permanence thing..
permanent condition: existence in the same form forever or for a very long time ```The Dictionary```

Show me a man with a tattoo and I'll show you a man with an interesting past. ~Jack London~
So, that's pretty cool..I like Jack London but that Call of the Wild was brutal..

Randomly posting....Hey..who has a tattoo...or wants a tattoo...or doesn't want a tattoo..or thinks those who get tattoos should get on a boat and move to an island filled with gothics and biker-punks (like Clint)...or thinks reading this blog was a royal waste of time....

*From "Tattoo" by The Who

Monday, April 24, 2006

Any day now, any day now, I shall be released*

I graduate in twenty days....
I never thought I would ever do this...
It took much much persuasion....
I am a girl who has taken the road less traveled...(props to Frost)
Its kind of a weird emotional time for me...

I'll post an can all come...:)

*From "I Shall Be Released" by Bob Dylan

Saturday, April 22, 2006

...And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me....

My job was to stand in the lane, at the finish line, ready to welcome the olympian with hugs and high 5's...We cheered our particular olympian on...I saw smiles..I saw some, never looking at the track, just looking up to the stands...I saw determined faces...I never once saw an unhappy face today, at the Special Olympics. One of my guys just couldn't stop laughing and he looked in my eyes and said, "I ran the whole way." Yes, you did buddy..I heard them cheering each other on..I heard.."I did it." I heard, "You did it!" I was sheepishly hugged and hugged by one big guy who lingered a bit long in our embrace, but ..that was okay. Oh, I am in love with Eric...He was awesome. He ran the 400 in one minute 7 seconds..All of us stood with our mouths wide open watching him turn the corner, never slowing down. He walks around like he is the leader. When he talks, you can't understand him, but those who live with him do. He cheers everyone on. He got up to throw the javelin (ok..not his event) and threw it really lousy ...everyone cheers and he walks back to his seat shrugging.."my arm hurtin." I just loved him...he would turn around and wave to me.
I called Sam and told him I was coming to get him because he just had to see this! Sam and three other 8th graders came along and they loved it. I pointed out this one guy who looked like Joe Dirt.
Is there anything anyone can say to me today to make me feel small? Absolutely not..I have had a full measure of love today. Is there any way I will be ungrateful today...absolutely not. Is there anyone who can wipe this smile off my face today? Absolutely not.....but hey..tomorrow is another day....I'll have to remind myself of this lesson learned..


That's Sam in the middle..he and some friends and youth interns from church went out to dinner and to see the Sentinel, last night..because well..Agent Jack Bauer from 24 is in it. Sam said it wasn't good. This is them being stupid. Seriously, my son will not just smile for the camera...he either has no expression or makes an ignorant face..its his rebellion..
Just thought I would let you see this boy you all prayed for. I told him all about all the prayers he got from all over. He thought that was "tight."
Well..I am off to work Special Olympics..I am sure I will have some stories!!

Friday, April 21, 2006

........Uriah the Hittite.......

I tutor in the Reading Clinic on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. The student I was assigned this semester was a 5th grader who's name is Uriah. I call him Uriah the Hittite. I told my brother about Uriah and he said, "Uriah the Hittite is one of my favorite characters in the Bible." So I reread about Uriah and I'll have to agree with Mark. He was one tight, loyal and fierce dude. Uriah was a bit shy at first but over the weeks we have become close. Our schedule begins with a trip to the Computer Lab where he works on some really amazing reading software. Then the next 40 minutes are just about me and him. We usually go plant ourselves at the tables by the snack bar, in the Administration Building. The nice lady there gave Uriah a free donut one day, so we always position ourselves close so that she might see us and Uriah may get another handout. It works. Yesterday, Uriah forgot his own reading book so we had to pick one from the Reading Clinic library. It looked like a good one. There was a picture of an indian on the front that Uriah said reminded him of Last of the Mohicans...okay..we got us some prior knowledge. "Today", I told Uriah, "I will read a page and then you will read a page." He agreed and I started reading. I fumbled over some pretty elaborate indian names. When it was Uriah's turn I told him to just pronounce them however he wanted to. Man, whatever happened to "Running Bear" or "Brave Elk", I mean these names were brutal to try to pronounce. Uriah is hilarious when he comes to one of these names..we start to get a bit tickled. I realize I need to get myself together and make sure his Mom get's her money's worth for this tutoring session. Then this little indian talks about drinking too much cider and needing to go outside. He goes outside.."unbuttons and relaxes" seriously..that was in the book. I try to keep it together and I did well until the rosebush begins to talk to the indian. Uriah and I look at each other and let loose with some uncontrollable laughter. I mean, we can't stop. I realize maybe Uriah and I just needed to laugh and that's a pretty big lesson to learn so I felt he didn't get cheated. I told him it was time to go and he said, "'This time goes by so fast." I love those pure moments when two people meet and feel better for it.
I was thinking how this semester has been alot about struggles and battles, for me, and just maybe God gave me a boy named Uriah, who is named after a warrior in King David's army...

Thursday, April 20, 2006

..God sent me a thunderstorm...

When he thunders, the waters in the heavens roar; he makes clouds rise from the ends of the earth. He sends lightning with the rain and brings out the wind from his storehouses.
Jeremiah 51:16

Yep..God sent a thunderstorm just for me last night..Those of you in Abilene, I am glad you got to reap the benefits of my gift. Some of you may remember my post on Thunderstorms and how I love them...well..last night was amazing. I sat on the front porch of my Mom's house watching the lightning show. It was quite a show. Some of the bolts of lightning looked just like the picture above. I was a bit sad when the thunder rolled off in the distance. He woke me again with another one at 2:30am..I just snuggled up in my blankets and smiled....

In your distress you called and I rescued you,
I answered you out of a thundercloud.
Psalms 81:7

Monday, April 17, 2006

.... "A day without laughter is a day wasted." Charlie Chaplin

Well, just seemed like lately my posts have been kinda serious.. life's been pretty serious lately...I'm just glad I don't have any Janis Ian Cds around the house or anything by Sylvia Plath..

Don't you like this flower...I do..
And now..a little any one liners..lay em on me....

Q. Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing?
A. He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.

Q. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A. A nervous wreck.

Q. What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A. Anyone can roast beef.

I saw a fish all by itself, I said, "Dude, you should stay in school." Mitch Hedburg..(only my favorite comedien...)

I bought a doughnut from a store and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut. I don't need a receipt for the doughnut. Man, I'll just give you money, then you give me the doughnut. End of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I just can't imagine a scenario where I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. Some skeptical friend: "Don't even act like I didn't get that doughnut, I've got the documentation right here. Oh wait, it's at home, in the file... under D... for doughnut" Mitch Hedburg..

I wish you love, peace, and most of all...lots of laughter........

Sunday, April 16, 2006

He is risen...just as He said....

The angel up on the tombstone
Said He has risen, just as He said
Quickly now, go tell his disciples
That Jesus Christ is no longer dead
Joy to the world, He has risen, hallelujah
He’s risen, hallelujah
He’s risen, hallelujah
`Easter Song...2nd Chapter of Acts`

I'm thinking about suffering today and I'm thinking about joy in the morning.
I was thinking about how I look at you know, make it stop...
I think I am rethinking this suffering deal...
I was thinking about Jesus...I was thinking back on the sequence of scenes, in The Passion of The Christ, where Jesus is walking with that cross. He bleeds from the flogging He has just survived and He's walking...He is in pain..He's walking...He's tired....He walks...
He asks me to (Luke 9:23) deny myself and carry His cross daily...
Carrying a cross is suffering..isn't it?
Mother Teresa said that everything is a blessing...hmm...that would mean that this suffering will be followed by joy in the morning...this suffering could be surgery which I need...

Hebrews 5
7While he lived on earth, anticipating death, Jesus cried out in pain and wept in sorrow as he offered up priestly prayers to God. Because he honored God, God answered him. 8Though he was God's Son, he learned trusting-obedience by what he suffered, just as we do. 9Then, having arrived at the full stature of his maturity and having been announced by God as high priest in the order of Melchizedek, 10he became the source of eternal salvation to all who believingly obey him.

So, my goal is to honor God in whatever I go through and the contentment which Paul speaks of falls down on my heart

Friday, April 14, 2006

a love that will not let me go......

Its too amazing for me to understand, this kind of love..

Thank you...these two words do not communicate my gratefulness...He asks, of me, to give my life for others and to love others as He has loved me...these are the things I will ponder tonight as I make my way to my friend's ranch and we along with many others will join in praise and song trying to tell Him thank you..

Thursday, April 13, 2006

No More Drama..........

I was listening to this Mary J Blige song, getting pumped up. I love this song. It just spoke to me. If you haven't heard it , download and listen.

I don't know
Only God knows where the story ends
For me, but I know where the story begins
It's up to us to choose
Whether we win or loose
And I choose to win
~No More Drama...Mary J Blige~

I choose Him. No more drama in my life, He is in control. That is really good news for me. Even through some pretty heavy stuff that went down this week, I was scared, but I knew who was in control. All your words and those around me, reminded me of that. He was speaking to me, through the love, touch and prayers of others, that He is here with me. There's some other stuff going on right now that is pretty unbelievable, but I know He is in control.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Awestruck we fall to our knees and we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God, you are amazing God.
.....Mercy Me....

Just heard from the Doctor....Sam has a stress fracture in his back....he will have to be inactive for the next three months...tricky to heal....but guys, I am praising God today because my baby is not sick. My prayers go out to all the mommies and daddies who do have sick babies...and my prayer for them is that they are covered with prayers, like a warm blanket on a cool I have had from everyone around me. I am touched that many of you, whom I have never met, prayed so fervently for this situation. I will never forget it..Go in love and peace and yes, joy for Sam the Mann....

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Sam's been scanned..

So when we feel the Spirit moving
Prompting, prodding, and behooving
There is no time to be losing, let us pray
~Steven Curtis Chapman~

My day began with going into Sam's room. I woke Sam up and he sat up,then immediately put his head in his hands groaning...I kept telling myself, "Don't cry, be strong." I went into the kitchen to the closest mirror, gave myself a short pep talk and then went back in. Sam begs for 10 more minutes of sleep and I oblige. I walk down the hall taking deep breaths.."I can do this." then.....the doorbell rang and my favorite prayer warrior steps in the door. She makes a beeline for Sam's room and said she knew she needed to come pray over Sam. We sat down on the bed, Sam smiles, Candy prays. After "amen" I felt peace and no more tears. Thank you, my friend. If you ever feel the urge to go pray over someone..don't hesitate. I can now vouch, from first hand experience, that it is a blessing.
Sam and I get in the car and one of Sam's favorite rock songs comes on. Part of the chorus is this guy screaming..NOTHING WRONG WITH ME...NOTHING WRONG WITH ME...NOTHING WRONG WITH ME. Well, we cranked that baby up. I told Sam that this was perfect. We was hilarious. I think I will love this song, now, forever.
Many told us stories of what a Bone Scan entailed...hours and hours..We arrived at the hospital and there waiting for us was a college youth intern from church. So precious. Into our second waiting room, they called Sam's name. I went in with him and the nurse sat Sam down and said, I kid you not, "I am about to inject you with radioactive tracer dye."..I felt like we were in a scene from 24.
So, she injected him, told him to go eat and come back in a couple of hours. We were so excited! We hightailed out of there. When we went back, the scan only took about 25 minutes. So, the experience was not as horrible as we had heard.
Now....the waiting....its in God's hands and I know He cares for Sam....

Monday, April 10, 2006

Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee....Psalms 55

So, Scott, I guess the benefit of being a stalker is that you are missed..

My life has been turned upside down a bit. Lots of variables..even down to yesterday...Its been a tough week....therein lies the reason for my quietness, Scott..
Sam, my son, has been experiencing back problems for awhile. We took him to Rehab and that didn't allevitate his pain...then sent for a back x-ray...sent to a back surgeon to decifer what looked like some problems in the x-ray...MRI...looks like there is a "lesion"....Bone Scan tuesday...
So..I ask for your prayers for Sam. He is a 15 year old, 5ft 8in, 162 pound precious boy. I ask for your prayers for me. I am afraid, but have lots of amazing prayer warriors out there...
My attention span, during the test on Saturday, was short. I found my mind wandering to thoughts of Sam and some other craziness that is happening in my life. Oh well...that is in God's hands..
I was on the floor, watching the 3rd season of 24, with Sam last night. He moved his head right next to mine and just cuddled with me. I know he's scared but doesn't know how to say it to me. We prayed and he fell asleep.
Blondie, black labs are awesome..Jett is all over Sam. He is a comfort and a provides a laugh for Sam.
How grateful I am that I have a Savior who's shoulders are big enough to carry what I can' am

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

"Courage is not the lack of fear but the ability to face it." ~Lt. John B. Putnam Jr.

Do you recall when I took the practice certification test? Do you recall that I was just a bit anticipative about it? Do you?
Well.....I am taking the REAL one on Saturday.....I am really needing to do well on it. I did well on the practice, but you know, you tell yourself stuff like, " got lucky!" or "Maybe they gave you the wrong test" or something like.."This time you will fail."..............................Anyone out there took a big test lately?


I love this speaks to me...
Fear by Casting Crowns
Oh, what I would do to have the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is, and he's holding out his hand
But the waves are calling out my name and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win, you'll never win, you'll never win."
Oh, what I would do to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant with just a sling and stone
Surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors shaking in their armour
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand
But the giant's calling out myname and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me time and time again
"Boy you'll never win, you'll never win, you'll never win."
But the stone was just the right size to take the giant down
And the waves don't seem so high when
I'm standing on top of them looking down
And I'd soar with the wings of eagles if I could just ignore the sound
Of the waves and the giants, the waves and the giants in my mind
Lord, you've not given me a spirit of fear
But of power and of love, and of a sound mind
So from now on, I won't let the tempter's lies turn my eyes away from the prize
That you have set before me.
That you have set before me.
...Lord, help me not to be afraid today.......I pray that goodness and mercy and peace rains down on all those who read this today...God loves me and I love you..

Sunday, April 02, 2006

I love thunderstorms...

She lived to be 100 years old. The lines on her face were like deep river beds brought about by rains of experience. She was raised by a Father who had become a christian after reading the Bible during his time as a POW in the Civil War. She married a preacher and raised four kids in Montgomery, Alabama. She loved her husband and told me many stories about him. He was friends with George Washington Carver. She was my safe haven. In my chaotic world, her love for me brought me peace. At Christmas time, we would travel from Tallahassee to Montgomery to spend the holidays with her. I can remember waking up to my Mother whispering, "We're here." Pulling up to Grandma's house, you could see her little 3 foot silver tree, in the window, and the room turning colors from red to blue to green from the color wheel she had plugged in. Jumping out of our station wagon, I would run, opening the squeaky screen door and ring the doorbell. And then...the sound I loved to hear, her high heels knocking on the wood floor as she hurried to the door. She opened the door and opened her arms. She was my good friend. Our relationship was grounded by summers spent together. I was too young to go to camp so they would drop me off at Grandma's house. She was a strong woman but had two great fears. She was afraid of birds and she was afraid of thunderstorms. I don't understand the bird phobia, but the thunderstorm fear was understandable. Thunderstorms in Montgomery were fierce at times. When one would would roll in she would get me to go lie down with her. We would lie there until the worst had passed. She would tell me stories of her youth. She would tell me stories of her husband and her children. How can this be such a rich warm time for me but for my Grandmother, a time of extreme fear? I felt safe and warm and loved and though I would never tell her, I would wish this thunderstorm would never end.
To this day..I love thunderstorms....